OH GOD I’M BLIND!

Today Show video of Richard Simmons.

Wait, stop a second before you click the link. First, this is Richard Simmons, not Gene Simmons of the rock band KISS, but Richard, the flamboyant fitness expert.

The video is from the Today Show, where they were appearantly preparing to go to Richard in the Studio, and he wasn’t aware that the camera was on yet.

That is the setup, now, decide if you really want to see this. I really isn’t THAT bad, but it is just one of those things that can take you by suprise.

Al Qaeda declares “go away, or we will taunt you a second time!”

Appearantly, Al Qaeda has decided to attack the United States, and President Bush, with words.

Yes, you read that right, they are now attacking with personnal taunts against Bush, by saying that he is an alcoholic liar.

OH MY GOD! We might have a politician who has a drinking problem, and who lies! That’s good, I thought he was addicted to power and a pathological liar, I guess things are starting to look up.

As for the title of this one, it is a paraphrase from a line from Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

Stargate SGC Propaganda Poster

What Bill Gates was really saying about Vista and Apple

The other day I read this newsweek article on the web which was an interview with Bill Gates on the release of Vista and about Apple’s ads. Really, I couldn’t stomach the entire thing.

This morning, I came across this article which points out some of the ways that Bill Gates seemed to have been crazy or angry, spouts effluence filled responses, and seems to be past some breaking point where it comes to Apple.

I have decided to post my translation of what was really being asked, and what Bill Gates was saying. Note, this is being printed without permission of anyone, and it is a parody of what each person was saying. This brings it under first amendment protections for a parody.

The original article can be found here .
Continue reading

following a thread of thought

Well, I walked in today and had great news. My boss quickly stops me, and lets me know that he has offered my services for phone support to a client and their client. Huh?

Let’s start with some background. There is a company, which we will call Company A, who wanted a piece of software. They hired Company B, from Russia, to handle the project. Then, Company B subcontracts the programming work to Company C, which is in India. Do you see a problem here? I do.
Continue reading

Karaoke, love, and The Boys of Summer

Well, my mother in law gave us a Karaoke machine for Christmas. Yes, a karaoke machine. So, the kids have been having fun with it. They finally got me to join in. My song? Well, let’s just say that the kids were laughing to my trying to sing some Vanilla Ice. At least there were laughs.

So, how does love, and the song “The Boys of Summer” have to do with any of this? I’m glad you asked. First off, true love is one of the few things that will get you through a karaoke session with a relationship intact. A good sense of humor on everyone’s part is the other. Usually, those two are found together.

Now, back before karaoke hit it big here in the US, at least in the part of Texas I lived in, about the nearest thing was singing along with the radio. There was a girl I was dating, and her musical interests were the country and christian music variety, mine was the rock variety. At that time, the local rock station was playing “The Boys of Summer” an awful lot. I mean, this was over 7 years after the song’s release, and not even summer. But I didn’t mind, because I really liked the song. My girlfriend new this.

One day we were at her place and getting ready to go somewhere. We get in the car, and “The Boys of Summer” is playing, yet again, and it is at the bridge of the song, just about to start the chorus again. She decides that she is going to sing along with the end of the song.

Those of you who don’t know, the song goes: verse 1, chorus, verse 2, chorus, bridge, chorus, chorus. For those of you who do know, you also know that the chorus changes, each time. Actually, just the second full line changes (I am including the half-line that begins the chorus as part of the first line). However, the first time and last time , that line sounds a lot alike. The first time, the line is “you got your hair combed back and your sunglasses on,” and the last time, the line is “you got that hair slicked back and those wayfarers on.” Deceptively alike, for those who didn’t know better yet.

So, we now have someone who knows the basic layout of the song, but not fully prepared for the subtle line changes, getting ready to sing along. You see the humor potential already, don’t you?

The chorus starts, and she starts to sing along. As the second line of the chorus ends, and she feels she knows where she is at, she starts singer stronger, or at least louder. By the time the chorus starts again, she is really into it. Thankfully, we have only started the car, and was backing out the long driveway, and not on the road yet, especially since she was driving.

Well, the chorus starts again, for the last time. She gets through the first full line, and the second one begins. I am sitting there appreciating her willingness to try. The line hits the first change, and she gets that look on her face that is the “did I hear that right?” Her voice falters just a little, but she is still going. Now, we hit the sunglasses/wayfarers change, and it is now a full fledges train wreck of thought and action. She stops, the car stops, heck, it seemed like the entire world stopped for just a moment, and all that was left moving through time was that song.

Thankfully, I did not burst out laughing, but I did snicker a good deal.

Now, what does that have to do with love? There was a moment, that split-second when the radio came on and she recognized the song. She knew I liked the song, and she was willing to enjoy the song with me. She was willing to sing along without any doubt or second thought. Be willing to enjoy the things your partner likes. It doesn’t mean you have to make those things your things too, but just enjoy them for how much your partner likes them.

And remember, love and a good sense of humor always helps, especially when it comes to karaoke.